Sandwiches and Some Math

Look at these two lovely ladies.

Honey ham, smoked turkey, sharp white cheddar, lettuce, tomato,
onion, mayonnaise, horseradish on toasted wheat bread.

I just ate both of them, but I also seized the opportunity to learn something new.  In my younger days, I would probably have just gone at these things without cutting them into smaller, more-manageable sections.  However, I've grown weary of replacing escapee ingredients ("drop-outs") and tying up both of my hands for a one-hand operation.  I grab a knife and slice it up.

But how?  Turns out we're going to use some math here, and I somehow managed to get through college without taking a math class, so...fingers crossed.


There are infinite possibilities, so we'll start with the two most basic ones..

Approach 1:  Central Cuts

Figure 1

These cuts start at the bread's head and cut straight down, resulting in two symmetrical sandwich sections (see Figure 1, left).

Pros:  Elegant symmetry can prevent slice favoritism.  There won't be a slice that you're less excited about eating.

Cons:  Since both slices are more or less the same, your journey will be a bit predictable.  Variety is usually a good thing.

Fan quote:  "If it's diagonal, I have one that's mostly the top of the bread, which I don't like as much." - J.B.

Approach 2:  Diagonal Cuts

Diagonal cuts start at a corner and end up at the opposite corner (see Figure 1, right).  Uh, doi!  This is my go-to move when I'm cutting a sandwich.

Pros:  Sharp corners make great starting points, 12% more total edge space (and 35% more crust-free edge space for you crustophobics) provides more starting points, and the asymmetry yields slice variety.

Cons:  You end up with one piece that has more bread-top, those pointed corners have a high crust content.

Fan quote:  "Diagonally, that way I have a corner to start with." - J.H.


A Fourth to be Reckoned With


You can also take these cuts the obvious next level, which would be fourths.  Fourths have some benefits, like being the most manageable size without getting insultingly small.  Some people find that fourths help with pacing, and eating multiple tiny sandwiches can be perceived as more filling than one big one.  I like finishing what I have and finding that there are three more patiently waiting for me.  They're also good for sharing.

Sometimes, however, fourths suck a big one.  Depending on your bread size, they can be too small to be of any use.  I'm often tempted to eat them in one big bite.  They're practically daring you to try it, so beware of the choking hazard.  They're also good for sharing, and opportunistic moochers will use this to bolster their argument.

Figure 2
Eat us in one bite...if you can.  Linda from work
says you're too scared and won't do it.

Squared Fourths (Approach 1)

The only thing I can really say about these ugly bastards is that they have an even crust/non-crust ratio (negligible difference on the round crust parts).

Trianglar Fourths (Approach 2)

Triangular fourths have 23% total edge space, 42% more crust-free edge space, and they're easier on the eyes, for reasons I can't figure out.  I think they appear larger, as well (see Figure 2 for comparison), but that must be some sort of trick, I mean...illusion.

What kind of cuts do you perform on sandwiches?  Centered or diagonal?  Halves or fourths?  Other?  Leave a comment to let me know!